posts
i took a career aptitude test and my result was henchman
4 Aug 2023i took a career aptitude test and my result was henchman
4 Aug 2023"The testing people said I’d make a good henchman for two reasons. First, like I said, the test was kinda hard for me and I didn’t know what any of the questions were trying to ask. They said most non-henchmen people know what the questions are asking them."
"The testing people said I’d make a good henchman for..."
it's the 1600s and i decided to become a pirate
14 July 2023it's the 1600s and i decided to become a pirate
14 July 2023"A good way to find a pirate is to look for the guys at a tavern with bad teeth. Unfortunately, pretty much everyone in the taverns has bad teeth. We don’t really care about things like oral hygiene in the 1600s."
"A good way to find a pirate is to look..."
benjamin franklin discusses his failed inventions
23 June 2023benjamin franklin discusses his failed inventions
23 June 2023"Benny Boy, I’m going to be honest with you. Your inventions are kind of duds these days. What do you mean? I’m a primo inventor. Everyone loves my inventions. "
"Benny Boy, I’m going to be honest with you. Your..."
i was the least elite member in an elite dolphin squadron
16 Jun 2023i was the least elite member in an elite dolphin squadron
16 Jun 2023"You might not know this, but dolphins have sonar built into their heads. That’s why the military wanted them. Because they can sonarily find anything the enemy is hiding underwater, like mines or submarines or cursed treasure."
"You might not know this, but dolphins have sonar built..."
conversations i've had doing door-to-door sales
30 May 2023conversations i've had doing door-to-door sales
30 May 2023"The biggest challenge though is that I’m not very good at the job. I had the lowest sales recorded in company history. Negative one sales, that’s my claim to fame."
"The biggest challenge though is that I’m not very good..."